Sibling Rivalry
The word “sibling” refers to brothers and sisters and “sibling rivalry” means the competitive feelings and actions that often occur among children in the family. There are things that you can do to try to reduce sibling rivalry.
- Treat each child as an individual. Help them understand that they are treated differently by you and have different privileges and responsibilities because they are different individuals.
- Respect each child’s space, toys, and time when he wants to be alone, away from his sibling.
- Avoid labeling or comparing one child to the other. This feeds into their competitiveness.
- When a new child comes into the family, adequately prepare the older sibling for her new important role. Make her feel like it’s her baby, too.
- Play detective. Watch and note when siblings are not getting along [before dinner, in the car, before bed] and plan separate quiet activities for those times.
- Watch how you treat each child to see if you are contributing to the rivalry. Make sure you are not playing favorites.
- Have realistic expectations of how they should get along, cooperate, share and like each other.
- Positively reinforce them when they are getting along or when they solve their own conflicts.
- Make each child feel special and important. Try to spend one-on-one time with each child every day.
Take time out for yourself to re-energize. Remember, sibling rivalry is a normal and expected part of a family